The Art of Tea and Poetry

The Art of Tea and Poetry

Hallucinations


Mood disorder is slow murder,
Side effects from a cocktail of
Meds taken every morning and night
Like clockwork take their toll,
Memories come and go with morphing
Of shadows in the dark,
Illusions at night are psychological
Manifestations of a guilty conscience,
Mere figments of imagination
Sometimes seem like demons hidden by light,
Fighting to be seen in silence,
Those stalking silhouettes sink back into
Shadows after catching corners of
Paranoid peripheral eyesight,
I see a figure standing behind me in the
Window reflection - nobody is there,
A man with a mask will vanish in the backdrop
As soon as a head turns to face it,
Not knowing what is real, what is false,
Fighting fears of phantoms finding
Ways into what should be an empty house,
Haunting hallways, having no mercy,
Deluding the senses of sanity,
Constant reminders of evil deeds done
Years ago when a young man knew no better,
Apparitions always make their presence known
When I am in solitude and stressed out,
A glimpse of a ghost that looks like me
Disappears before my very eyes and then
I hear my name being called - nobody is there,
Faint sounds of whispering behind the walls
Speak in a language that can't be understood,
Perception is a toy when the mind plays games,
Suggesting there are people watching,
Waiting, plotting, following, tapping phones,
I remember a coping skill from a friend
That helped her maintain in similar situations,
Find a spoon and fill it with relief,
Take a small piece of dark brown sugar,
Cook it with water, mix the solution,
Filter it with a cotton swab and suck it in,
Find the sweet spot, draw blood and push,
The mild sting from a bite of this plastic pet
Mosquito brings a pleasant promise:
For a small while the misery goes away,
Voices stop speaking, Images vanish,
Ideas cease to exist,
- Peaceful bliss,
This concoction looks like chocolate,
But it can make someone sleep forever,
A fatal dose brings me closer to death,
Family finds me deep in the black abyss,
They call EMS and a three day hold is placed,
Imprisoned in the hospital psych ward where
A doctor gives me more pills for my head
And followup treatment six weeks from today,
But if the first batch of meds didn't help
I can't expect much difference from this combination,
This is some kind of dichotomy, a vicious cycle,
Help from the system only brings the same result,
I cannot be honest with the doctor,
His eyes are quietly condescending as he scans
My every answer to his questions,
Scribbling away at the papers in the manila folder,
Searching for something suggesting serious sickness,
Truth brings a 52.50 upgrade, possibly more,
The psych team is told what it wants to hear,
Freedom from the hospital prison will
Come no other way, the staff is told lies,
Release is granted but the mind is still trapped,
Suddenly, another ideation appears above the others,
There will come a day that is special,
Where there is no escape from the hallucinations,
On that day I will shut down,
I can only hope that my circle will understand
That I wasn't being selfish and wanted to hurt nobody,
Simply put, hallucinations got the better of me


About the Poet

D.W. Palma has been writing since he was young. Rap and rhyme, poetry and prose, songs and stories; writing is his dream and passion. Most of what he writes about pertains to societal inequities and the darker sides of human nature as a reflection of the reality of the world in which we live. He hopes to bring about awareness of these issues, as well as provide a perspective of how "the other" sees things. He also touches on subjects regarding love and beauty. He has been credited as a songwriter for a few indie albums and has had some work published in journals and anthologies.

The Poet

D.W. Palma has been writing since he was young. Rap and rhyme, poetry and prose, songs and stories; writing is his dream and passion. Most of what he writes about pertains to societal inequities and the darker sides of human nature as a reflection of the reality of the world in which we live. He hopes to bring about awareness of these issues, as well as provide a perspective of how "the other" sees things. He also touches on subjects regarding love and beauty. He has been credited as a songwriter for a few indie albums and has had some work published in journals and anthologies.

© Frecklewood 2017, All rights reserved.

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© Frecklewood 2014, All rights reserved.